Last time, I went through a crisis scenario – one that I dealt with myself, involving glamour models, murder and steak and chips (this is what I love about this industry – that fact that you couldn’t dream most of this stuff up if you tried) – on a gene-molecule level.

Well, in fairness, I probably missed loads, but I hope it gave an idea of the questions you need to ask, the things you need to prepare and the actions you need to take in the event of a crisis – involving customers, media, emergency services and staff – happening to you. I hope I also managed to communicate a) just how full-on it all is and b) the fact that loads of people are – and should be – involved. If any of this is news to you – go back and have another look at it.

This time, I want to do a fly-past of three incidents – not all mine and all very different – each of which contains a key learning that might help in the future when you’re in the middle of it. (I can’t reinforce this enough – it’s not a question of ‘if’, dear blog snorkellers, it’s a question of ‘when’. It IS going to happen to you.)

The first one is the Kegworth air disaster. For those who don’t know, Kegworth is a small English village in the county of Leicestershire, not terribly far away from the M1 motorway, a main arterial road link. In January 1989, a British Midland 737-400 passenger aircraft crashed some few hundred yards short of the runway at East Midlands airport, into an embankment of the motorway, killing 47 people. “A remarkable” 79 people survived however and, as you can imagine, the media were all over it like a rash – let’s face it, a passenger plane, in bits, lying on a motorway makes good television.

No doubt about it – this was a disaster both in terms of the incident and for British Midland the company. All sorts of stuff came out – the plane, for example, had recently had some upgrades and the pilots had had something like one half-hour briefing on the changes. The cause of the crash was a problem with one of the engines – the pilots shut the wrong one down, turning the aircraft into a 50-tonne glider. It was messy, and yet the company’s reputation survived – thanks to the actions taken by its chairman. It seemed like minutes, but it must have been hours, when Michael Bishop first appeared on the scene. He went straight up to the media and said (something like) “this is a dreadful incident, and we’ll get to the bottom of it as quickly as we can – in the meantime, I’ve got to go and help those people” and off he went towards the ‘plane. In that moment, he swung public opinion on to his side, on to the side of the company. Sheer brilliance.

Secondly, we have a product recall situation at a brewery. The ‘contamination’ of one particular batch of a very famous beer product was reported by quality control in the brewhouse – because of a worn component in the pipes, bacteria had escaped the regular cleaning process and were present when the beer travelled through the lines. Unfortunately, such was the turnaround time that the batch in question (amounting to as many as 1 million pints) was already in pubs and shops nationwide.

‘Contamination’ is such a strong word, don’t you think? What was really wrong with the beer? Well, actually, as it turns out, nothing, other than it may taste a bit funny – no-one was going to be made ill, no-one would be shouting Ralph in a pub car park, in fact – whisper it – no-one might actually notice.

We were prepared to do the recall and we were ready for all the fall-out. In the end, it was much, much simpler – and much, much cheaper – not to. The point is that one should always think through every situation before taking the obvious course of action. Sometimes you’re better off not doing anything.

Finally, Domino’s Pizza on YouTube. Well, you can read my post on it. Some say they handled their crisis well, others say they didn’t. Certainly, following on from the incident, their UK team has made a little hay while the sun was shining (or otherwise). It’s an ill wind, as they say. The reason I cite this here is because this was one of the first incidents that was created by social media and which – rightly or wrongly, to a greater or lesser extent – was dealt with via social media.

The point is that whether we like social media or not – and I don’t – it has changed the landscape of communications and the way that information gets around. It is a threat and (apparently) an opportunity – what’s certain is that social media needs to be dealt with in your crisis management plan – and I’ll get to this next time

So there you are, sat in front of the TV of an evening, having just enjoyed your dinner, swirling the last dregs of your fine burgundy ‘round the bottom of the glass when your eye is taken by something on the news. It’s your factory on fire. Or your plane nose down in a field. Or your guests being stretchered out of one of your hotels/restaurants/health clubs. Or a special report from the City. Or any one of the potential nightmares that you’ve spent hours imagining and planning for. And you didn’t know it was happening.

Rewind, quick. OK – there’s you, taking a copy of your crisis management plan, with the contact numbers and the rota lists and – with the blessing (and authority) of the plan’s owner – running a training session with whoever your front line people are. Making sure that they know that, in amongst all the chaos that they might be dealing with, they MUST call you (or a member of your team) and they MUST NOT attempt to deal with external comms themselves.

So there you are, sat in front of the TV of an evening etc etc etc having just taken the ‘phone call that lets you know it’s all gone a bit pear-shaped up at t’mill. What to expect, what to do and what decisions to make?

• Not all crises are the same and not all require an instant response – and not all are crises. Some are just issues. Which is yours and what do you really need to do? Take some time out to think about it and bear in mind that there are always people who like a nice bit of drama and who will happily create a crisis where there wasn’t one before
• A product recall, for example, may take some evaluation before it’s actioned. The product may not be dangerous or risky in any way – simply faulty. In this case you’ve got time to think, and the knowledge that no-one’s going to hear about it (if you’re lucky) until you decide to make it public
• On the other hand, a product recall may be occasioned by truly dangerous products, which pose a danger to life and limb – in which case you’ve got no time at all, and it is going to be a big story, very quickly, over which you will have no control
• Where is your crisis, supposing it’s serious enough to warrant your presence? Can you get there? Can your team get there? Can your spokesperson/people get there? If not – who are you going to use ‘on the ground’ to champion communications?
• What has actually happened, and what might happen next? What are your audiences going to need to know? Who needs to know within your organisation? Does the whole organisation need to know?
• Are there factors outside your control – which change your status from ‘driver’ to ‘passenger’ – these might include terrorism, or Act of God. If so, who do you need to deal with to ensure that you are aligned and ‘on-message’?
• If there’s a crisis ‘scene’ – who’s there? Have the emergency services, or the media, or the public turned up? Who’s dealing with them, or is it a free-for-all?
• What’s the potential impact of this – short and long-term? What needs to happen to minimise the impact?

By asking these questions (and others like them) and considering these issues (and other like them) – exercise your own judgement here – you’ll begin to get a picture of what you’re facing, and can start to react.

Next time, no waffle, just real examples.

Here we are – roughly half-way through this rapid and rather random fly-past of the anatomy of a crisis and how one might plan for same. This is part five which means – oh, but yes, dearest blog snorkellers – another five to go! I promise – on all that I hold sacred, on Roget’s Thesaurus – that the next bits (well, the ones after this) will be more exciting. And practical.

Anyway – this is just a summary of where we find ourselves, and how you might consolidate the work that you’ve done. I’m not going to insult you, so I’ll keep it brief. In no particular order:

1)       Write everything you’ve discovered to date down. This may be stating the obvious, but the obvious is what you’re going to want when the merde hits the aircon. Writing things down allows you to demonstrate to others that things have been thought about and – often more importantly – remind them that they were there when the thinking was going on. (Did I mention that crises are noted for their internal political aspect? No? They are.) All that aside, by now you’ve got lists of potential issues and crises, contingency planning for the more likely or the more serious, statements and Q&A, escalation procedures, rotas and contact lists, places to go and schedules of equipment that you’re going to need. Writing it down will explain to others, and you (at 0500 on a Wednesday, when your memory’s not working), how it all links together

2)       Get examples of all the stuff you’ve put together so far. Put each item in a different plastic folder, label it as an appendix and attach it to the beginnings of a plan you’ve just written down (see point 1). I know, I know – I’m insulting your intelligence. Or am I? Don’t hide this stuff away – everyone who might be involved in a crisis situation should have a copy of it. Whether they like it or not

3)       Store all of this electronically. If you can, if your IT department will let you, if your company is technologically literate enough, if there are enough people able to access it from outside the company – get it all on a server somewhere (possibly password protected) so that those that need to access it when the time comes, actually can

4)       Brief your people. You’ve done quite a lot of work at this stage, and the stuff you’ve been working on – although all a bit navelly-gazely at times – is very important. We’ll get on to internal comms later, but now is the time to do some briefing of your staff. Not everyone needs to know everything, but it doesn’t do anyone – especially in an organisation that might not, how shall we say, have the most robust and open and values-led culture – any harm to be splashed with the fear of God every now and then

Now we’re cooking with gas. One thing I completely forgot to mention specifically, but who knows, you may have got there before me, is the list of the emergency services and the local authorities that you would do well to have in your folder when the time comes.

Next time, we’ll explore what to expect when a crisis actually happens, The we’ll get to internal comms, business continuity, social media and running a trial of your plan.

And until then – keeeeeep panicking!