Marketing

It’s The Brand, Stupid

Posted on by in Communications Strategy, External Communications, Marketing, Public Relations and tagged , , , , , , .

It’s been a rollercoaster couple of weeks.

Patrick Swayze passes away, the wife goes into mourning and, if I interpreted the brief glimpse I got of the TV last night correctly, sitting through Dirty Dancing (again) looms large in my future. (Which begs the obvious question – why does everyone consider Dirty Dancing a better film than Point Break?)

Then the world-stopping news that gastronaut Keith Floyd’s clogs have gone pop (rather delightfully, after a large meal, with wine), I’m in mourning, and no matter how much I may wish it, I cannot see Auntie Beeb treating me to an evening of back-to-back Floyds on Whatever. Anyway, back to me, Clive.

So I’m feeling a little bruised inside, and – is there no let up? – the breaking news that Keisha has left (ousted, more like) the Sugababes, to be replaced by the less-than-successful and (in my opinion) pulchritudinally-challenged Eurovision entry, Jade Ewen.

Which means that there are no members of the original line-up left in the band. Cue frenzied debate around whether the name should be changed, whether, indeed, Sugababes should continue, whether the fans are being cynically exploited.

The answer to all of this – if I can be tiresomely arch (and I can, oooo, I can) – is in the letter ‘r’. There are now no members of the original line-up left in the brand. But the brand itself continues. What’s fascinating about this is that, in a world of manufactured pop music and fake bands, the Sugababes have always seemed to have the edge – there was something almost credible about them (maybe it was – is – the constant rumours of in-fighting, bullying and general nastinesses) – and yet, with the constant changes in line-up, they are the most manufactured outfit of the lot.

So manufactured, in fact, that it no longer matters who works for it. The Sugababes is a brand, like Special K – those who work for it are its guardians and that’s all they will ever be. (Pity poor Jade, who may think that she’ll leave some impression on the brand, but obviously won’t – like the brand manager who thought up Frosted Shreddies – who remembers him? Or her, obviously).

And like any brand, its loyal consumers will still continue to purchase it, whether the packaging changes, whether it now has 20% less fat (and this is not a veiled reference to Ms Buchanan, she was my favourite, after Mutya, clearly), whether it now has a chocolate coating or added boysenberries.

And it’s a timely lesson to all communicators – something for us to remember when dealing with our customers, external and internal. We (they) are not the story. The brand is the story. No-one person is bigger than the brand.

And the show must go on.

Social Media – In Cyberspace, No-one Listens to You Scream

Posted on by in Communications Strategy, External Communications, Marketing, Public Relations, Social Media and tagged , , , , , , , , , .

A long, long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away, I was working for a company in relation to whom the use of the phrase ‘set in its ways’ was being kind. It was a company run by quite elderly gentlemen in suits (even those who weren’t quite elderly somehow were, if you see what I mean) who sat around in old wood-panelled offices and once a year, at Christmas, stood outside the gates and threw sovereigns to the barefoot orphans in the snow. OK, they didn’t, but it was THAT sort of company. The company made its money by enticing people to its premises and selling them intoxicating beverages and a selection of (mostly) fried food and, sometimes, a bed for the night.

In 1999, the world changed. Almost overnight, the talk was of internet entrepreneurs and dotcom business and simply extraordinary amounts of money were being bandied around in connection with the aformentioned entrepreneurs and businesses. This, we were told, was the future – there was to be no looking back and before very long, everything was going to be done over the internet. Shopping, socialising, consulting, meeting – everything. Don’t argue, we were told, it is inevitable.

Shiny Object Syndrome took hold. Hitherto rational companies started re-inventing themselves as dotcoms. Massive investments were made – in technologies that no-one fully understood and were not able to fully leverage or utilise. The company that I was working for was the subject of an article in the FT – would it be able to reinvent itself as a dotcom – how would the inevitable change to a digital way of life affect its business.

I’d like to claim that we were clever and anticipated the collapse of the house of cards, but we weren’t, we were simply unprepared, and being simply unprepared, we told the truth. We were banking on the fact that there would never be a transition to an online way of life. People need people need people. Sure, this new-fangled webby thing would help people find information and organise themselves and communicate – but there’d never be any substitute for meeting up over an intoxicating beverage. And, as history tells us, we were right.

Fast forward to 2007. I have been reincarnated into the exhibition industry – luckily as a corporate communicator and not a small stone which is probably what the Buddhists would have preferred. I learn very quickly that the exhibitions – or rather the ‘events’ – industry is way behind any other 21st century industry sector to the point that it is almost as if the 21st century hadn’t actually happened. I land in this frightening landscape just as the industry notices t’interweb and freezes like a resident of Norfolk caught in headlights – it’s the end of events as we know them, they shriek (eventually) – everyone’s going to be doing everything online! Quick, quick – reinvent ourselves as online communities and virtual exhibitions! Cue an all-too-familiar scramble to invest in technologies that no-one fully understands and no-one can fully leverage or exploit.

Long story short – it didn’t happen. The events industry is still going strong and, the last time I looked, it was in growth. Why? Because people need people need people. They need to interact in real time, to see, to hear, to touch, to smell – to experience. Real business does not get done on-line. Real business is done over a handshake, when you’ve seen the whites of the eyes, or the cut of the jib or whatever cliched metaphor tickles your fancy.

And here we are in 2009. Many would have us believe that social media is the next big thing. That without it, as communicators, as businesses, as brands, we’re missing out and – in the future – we’ll lose ground. And it is with a disorienting and rather queasy-making sense of deja-vu that I see otherwise sane companies running around throwing money at social media strategists, buying technology and expertise that they don’t fully understand and can’t fully leverage or exploit.

In the meantime – because people need people need people, because the internet is a lonely place, because you cannot guarantee that anyone is listening – the social media gurus themselves are organising live events (‘Tweetups’ – a term coined by Scott Monty, a man with either too much time on his hands, or no need for sleep) so that they can meet, interact with, see, touch and smell (not too much smell, please) their followers and the people they follow.

This is, of course, an activity that’s facilitated by social media. No issues with that. On a social/personal basis, it makes sense. For a brand, corporation or organisation however – it doesn’t.

Cut out the middleman – in this case social media – and use the budget, time and resource that you’ve liberated against experiential activity. Meet with your audiences. Let them touch and feel and taste your products.

Or, at the very least, take them down the pub.

Monetising Social Media – The Return of The Snake-Oil Salesmen

Posted on by in Communications Strategy, Evaluation, External Communications, Marketing, Social Media and tagged , , , , , , , .

Couldn’t let this one go without some sort of comment.

Yesterday I was forwarded an email invitation to attend the breathlessly-billed ‘first ever Marketing (magazine) live webcast on monetising social media’. The only good thing about it is that it’s free – but, working on the principle that there is no such thing as a free lunch, I would imagine that sales messages are going to be sloshing over its gunwales and that the ‘highest rated speakers in this space’ are going to be ‘social media strategists’ one and all, representing the very finest in social media marketing service provision. But I’m just cynical about these things.

Anyway, it’s a free world, so if you’re interested, clickety-dickety here.

 However, the bit that I couldn’t let pass without comment was this:

“Sites like YouTube, Twitter and FaceBook have been real cash cows for some marketers, but what are the secrets of their success?”

Sorry? Who, exactly, are these marketers for whom social media has been such a cash cow? I’m aware of a number of brands/companies/organisations that have pumped a lot of money IN to social media marketing – but I really don’t know of any who’ve found social media to be a ‘cash cow’. (And don’t get me wrong – I’d be very interested by, and grateful for, any good examples.)

Or are the marketers that have found social media to be a cash cow those who carped the diem and reinvented themselves as social media marketers – and are now rolling in fees chucked at them by brands/companies and organisations desperate not to miss out on what they’ve been told is the ‘next big thing’?

That’s the way to do it, that’s the way to do it

Posted on by in Communications Strategy, External Communications, Marketing, Public Relations and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , .

This is just a bit of a shout out to my homies at Morrisons (the UK supermarket chain, purveyors of splendid vittles to the masses). It’s not often that I come over all enthusiastic about things, but in this case, my hat is off and there’s a fair amount of awe in the air.

It’s simply that these people have got it so, so right. Everything working in perfect harmony. Branding, marketing (national and local), external communication, store design and layout, staff training (and therefore, I presume, staff communication). As an example, I will cite the chappie who pushed a leaflet through my letterbox recently (after having struggled up my five-mile driveway, obviously, and having avoided the guard lions). I get lots of gnolls pushing leaflets through my letterbox. This bloke was smart, energetic and he was wearing a branded t-shirt. Do you know – I actually EMPATHISED with him.

It is brilliant. I know that all of this is not, strictly, communications. This is strategic development and ops, commercial and supply, HR and finance. But the undoubtedly correct decisions that they have made have been rolled out and presented to their customer base in – as far as I’m concerned – an almost perfect manner.

I could wax even more lyrical – about their choice of brand spokescelebrity, for example, and how they’ve been used, about the idea of food poetry in store – but I won’t. This is best practice and we should all be able to learn from it.

What I would, however, like to flag up – and it’s not my field of expertise, so I’m being presumptuous – the issue of Morrison’s timing. It couldn’t have been better. Tesco, Sainsbury, Asda – is it me, or are they all a bit – well – tired at the moment? My suspicion is that they’ve been back-footed by a small player, given a lesson in reinvention, and they may, just may, be having a little panic right about now.

And all of this has translated into a really shiny results announcement yesterday – yes, the management recognised that these are interesting times for the economy, which may, interestingly, have favoured their performance, and therefore it might not be wholly sustainable, but still – a genuine result from a glow-in-the-dark performance.

And – ooooh – and (as far as I can see) not a Twitter feed in sight.

Anyway – there we are. Normal service (me complaining about stuff) will be resumed shortly.

Social media: Preposterous before…er…Posterous came along?

Posted on by in Communications Strategy, External Communications, Marketing, Public Relations, Social Media and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , .

Apparently sane person is asked what they consider to be the ‘next big thing’ in social media. (Actually, scratch that ‘apparently sane’ bit – anyone who’s in a position to be asked what they consider to be the blah blah blah is obviously several tweets short of the full nest.) And this person named three potentials – Foursquare, Brightkite and Posterous and another one the name of which I simply couldn’t be arsed to remember which wasn’t, after all, a ‘social medium’ in the true sense, more a CMS. Which, therefore, doesn’t really make it eligible to be the new Twitter. Even I know that.

Anyway, given that I’ve already had a look at Brightkite some time ago and felt that it really had very little to offer (well, it didn’t, go and look for yourself), I thus had two to choose from and I chose Posterous.

Now. If something had been touted to you as the next big thing in social media, you’d expect it to be a bit special, wouldn’t you? Wouldn’t you? Or is it just me? Yes, of course you would. Well, here it is:

http://posterous.com/

And no, don’t bother, because it isn’t.

Maybe it is me. Maybe I’m missing something. I read another post this morning about the wonderful world and uses of Twitter and how big companies like Dell and Pepsi and Coke…………………hold on a cotton-picking moment. Aren’t they the same three companies that are ALWAYS mentioned whenever someone wants to demonstrate how social media has been used to corporate advantage? Are there no other examples?

I can only draw one conclusion. And it’s the same one. Social media and social media marketing are another minor royal with no clothes on. Not even an Emperor, more a Duke of somewhere not-terribly-important. Posterous – and the acqusition of Friendfeed by Facebook are nothing more than the desperate attempts of those who are making a living from the chimaera to string that living out for a little longer.

Tell me I’m wrong.

Social Media – A Tweet in Time….er….

Posted on by in Communications Strategy, Crisis Management, External Communications, Marketing, Public Relations, Social Media and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , .

Some more happy horsedroppings, this time from that venerable organ, the WSJ. Read it here.

http://online.wsj.com/article/SB124925830240300343.html

On first glance this all seems fine – big names – Ford, Pepsi, Coke etc etc etc – all got a social media presence, all got social media teams, must be important.

Then delve down a bit.

So Ford found that people were complaining about the shutting down of a website. C’mon guys. So what. Is this actually going to affect sales of your cars (because that’s what, as an auto manufacturer, you’re all about and don’t you forget it). No, it’s not. Therefore, all the time that your people spent ‘rectifying the situation’ was, in fact, time wasted.

So Coke found that some guy with 10,000 followers was having difficulty reclaiming a promotion. They fixed it for him. He chaged his avatar to a picture of him with a bottle of Coke. Hot-diggety-dog-dump and a big fat whoop-de-do. Did it sell more Coke? Probably not. Did it impact on this guy’s 10,000 followers? Probably not. Why? because most of those followers don’t actually exist or, if they do, aren’t active. See the link below:

http://www.downloadsquad.com/2009/08/13/firm-reports-twitter-is-40-useless-babble-were-0-surprised?icid=sphere_wpcom_inline

So, Coke, all that time your people spent sorting it out? Wasted.  In fact, the WSJ article is just plain wrong, on many, many different levels. Not least of which is that it reveals that these companies have such desperate cases of Shiny Object Syndrome that they are lashing undoubtedly obscene amounts of money on the salaries and benefits packages of entire teams of ‘social media strategists’.

C’mon. Facebook and Twitter (there’s another thing wrong with this article – gives it the lie in fact – these are the only two social media mentioned) are passing fads. There’s no burgeoning new comms/marketing world being signalled by social media/online social networking. It’s a chimaera. It doesn’t exist – and neither, therefore, does ‘social media strategy’ or, indeed, ‘social media strategists’. Waste of money and several perfectly good workstations.

As an aside, I saw that Dominos Pizza were speaking at a conference recently – one of those that hapless comms and marketing people like us pay oodles of cash to go to on the off-chance we might learn something. And they were there to talk about the issues around employees posting uncontrolled video footage on YouTube and other social media. Talk about shutting the door after the horse had buggered off – and what did anyone think they were going to learn from Dominos, anyway. I was amazed.

Finally for today, may I express my dismay that the digital/social media strategists employed, at great cost, by Coke, appear to have managed to get permission for a group of people to post to social media sites (probably FaceBook and Twitter – as the only ones that anyone really knows) without going through the PR department. Someone could do with talking to Dominos, now I think about it.

I love the smell of impending disaster in the morning, it smells of – hmmm – Meat Feast?  Or is it random brown sugary liquid? I’m not sure………..

Social Media – Another Case of ‘Shiny Object Syndrome’

Posted on by in Communications Strategy, Evaluation, External Communications, Marketing, Public Relations, Social Media and tagged , , , , , , .

Oooh, ooh! Look! It’s new! It’s exciting! I’ve got to have one! What if everyone else has one and I don’t?

Yes, it’s Shiny Object Syndrome again. Further proof that the communications/marketing world is in danger of drowning – despite the stuff it’s drowning in being so incredibly, indescribably shallow.

Today, gentle communicatorists, the Shiny Object of our Syndrome is apps. iPhone Apps in particular, but please take it to mean any app that can be downloaded or installed on your device of choice.

There I was, ghosting around the net (I think that’s a splendid term and perfectly describes the squillions of people, moving around the netosphere at any one time, leaving no trace save for a record of their IP address and clickety proclivities – both bits of information that are of no use at all to the ‘social media marketer’), and I found someone pleading for an answer to the question:

“How are you using iPhone Apps in your marketing and PR plans?”

Virals, anyone? (ie a useless waste of money that achieves little cut through and no tangible ROI.) Luckily, in amongst the ‘social media marketing experts’, who were gushing about how the design and production of bespoke branded iPhone Apps  represents the future of marketing and communications (or, at least, will keep them employed when Twitter and FaceBook inevitably turn to dust in their hands), there were one or two brave souls who simply said ‘what’s the point?’ Just another fad in the making and one that our experience should tell us is likely to be simply an expensive chimaera.

As ideas go – well, you cannot polish a turd. Seemingly, however, you CAN roll it in glitter.

Oh – and virals. As if further proof were needed of what an incredible waste of time, effort, technology and budget they are, have a look at this:

http://newteevee.com/2009/08/11/the-megawoosh-waterslide-viral-how-it-was-really-done/

Great film. Turns out it’s a ‘carefully crafted viral ad for Microsoft’s Office suite’. So carefully crafted, in fact, that the result is promotionally homeopathic. The brand message has been diluted so much that it is no longer there.

How can anyone see any value in this? Or is it that the executives who commissioned it have a particularly bad case of SOS?

The Bog of Social Networks – Mayhem in a PC

Posted on by in Communications Strategy, External Communications, Marketing, Social Media and tagged , , , , , , .

Right. Dig out your very best tweed. Ratchet your age up (or down) to about 60-ish. A moustache is optional (especially for the ladies) but, if you’re wearing one, make it big. And bushy. It would help if you were red in the face, and if you could get various bits of you to quiver in outrage, then so much the better. Middle-class and middle-England is what we’re aiming at here – driven slightly demented by the combined forces of change and the Daily Mail. Splutter a bit and do it in the ver’, ver’ finest cut-crystal accent that you can muster. You are as bemused as Victor Meldrew in One Foot in the Grave and as angry as John Malkovich in Burn After Reading. Ready? Go!

“Social networks are bogs filled with people who are there to befriend one another, tell their stories, or voice their complaints. For those who want others to know all about them or who have unrevealed grievances about life, these are wonderful online destinations. They are a good place to leave messages for friends, propose marriage, and post the scores from the local high school football team. They are not a place where an advertiser can focus on a single group with a message aimed at those people, because no one knows exactly who those people are. For a company trying to sell products or services, Facebook is mayhem in a PC. What the advertiser wants is traditional, orderly content. “

 I love a good rant. But, you know what, I love a good rant even more when it makes absolute sense and is completely on the button.

Altogether now. “Harrrumph!”

Social Media – A New Dotcom Bubble, As If Proof Were Needed

Posted on by in Communications Strategy, External Communications, Marketing, Public Relations, Social Media and tagged , , , , , , , .

ITV sell Friends Reunited for £145m less than they paid for it. DC Thomson buy it, announce that they plan to make a dating site for the over-50s out of it.

As a service for the hard-of-thinking, in simple terms, this is what it means. ITV paid over £150m for Friends Reunited because they thought they could ‘monetise’ it (to press a curennt buzzword into service). They couldn’t. DC Thomson, being slightly smarter AND with the benefit of some years extra intel, realise that they’ll not be able to sell it as a marketing/advertising opportunity, so look at the ways they can make money from the users of the site. Who happen to be over 50 and – let’s face it – looking for something.

This – and eBay’s experience with Skype (OK, not technically a social network, but reliant on users parting with cash to communicate with each other) – really underlines where we are with social media as a marketing tool. Nowhere. Marketing activity through social media delivers no tangible value – certainly nothing that translates into noticeable uplift in revenues. The ITV/Friends Reunited debacle just shows how futile it is to try and ‘monetise’ – get a sensible, serious and stable revenue stream out of – a social medium.

It is an object lesson. Do not do it.

Oh, I hear you say, but I have no intention of buying placebebo.com and trying to monetise it. No, my social media marketing strategies involve using existing social media channels, and require no investment from me.

Wrong. Every hour you, or your people, spend monitoring Twitter or creating groups on Facebook is time, effort and opportunity cost that would be better dedicated elsewhere.

(Oh, yeah – Twitter – becoming the province of the middle-aged and older. Young people moving away, new research says so. Google it.)